Purity, Community, and Magic

As I have mentioned before, I started out approaching my nightly devotions from a Hellenic perspective.  The purification that I do involves khernips.  Some people do khernips a little differently, but for me this consists of washing my faces and hands in water that contains kosher sea salt.  I’m getting the nudge that I should be doing something else.  I usually don’t do a full shower before my devotions because I do the devotions after work/but before bed and my hair just takes too long to blow dry.  I either sleep with a wet head, or I give my hair several hours during the day to dry itself.  Part of this is probably laziness and part is probably the fact that I’m just not very good at that kind of stuff.  My husband jokes that I’m the only person he knows who uses two towels upon leaving the shower but who is still wet when she leaves the bathroom.  Some how, I just never got the hang of drying my hair.  I’m getting a hint, however, that my pre-ritual teeth brushing and khernips (and I always pull my hair back, another ancient Hellenic thing) are not enough.  I feel that I’m supposed to be focusing on purity, so I could totally be wrong by focusing on my purity during my devotions in particular, but it’s my best guess.  My nightly devotions are fairly laid back in general, but I guess I could try taking a shower first and then just tying my wet hair back.  I get that I’m not in my cleanest state after spending each evening in the microbiology section of a medical lab.  Maybe it’s time I start trying to change up my purity routine for devotions.

Another thing that I’ve been feeling nudged on is introducing myself to the Kemetic community.  The fact that it’s a good time to meet people has been coming up a lot in the cards.  I am not good at introducing myself to people, especially people whose practices and insight are way more developed than mine.  I can’t think of anything that I would bring to the relationship, so I just don’t introduce myself.  Have I mentioned that I’m an avoider?  I regularly follow a number of blogs, even before I created this wordpress account.  I set up a Tumblr account just so that I can catch some Djehuty-related information, but I never post or respond on there.  Actually introducing myself and saying “Hey, I think you’re great.  You seem to have solid relationships with your Gods.  I’m still pulling stuff out of my butt and hoping that my responses aren’t just my ego, want to be my friend?” scares the crap out of me.  SCARES THE CRAP OUT OF ME.  Posting on e-Cauldron’s forum took me awhile, but at least that is a forum set-up.  I wasn’t going up to specific people and getting in their space.  I’m not sure how exactly I’m going to go about this.  I told Djehuty that if He could send me a sign to help confirm it was Him, that might be a helpful confidence booster, or even an icebreaker.  I’m not holding my breath, though.  I don’t know anyone well enough to ask for a divination, and I don’t even know how you would divine that.  I just feel poorly prepared to venture out into the Kemetic community.  I did send in my application for the beginner’s class at the House of Netjer (Kemetic Orthodoxy), and I could just hide until that starts in mid-May (assuming I get in).  I have a feeling, however, that I’m supposed to be doing more than that.  Maybe I’ll ask Sekhmet-Mut for a little confidence, send a few e-mails, and then hide in the corner with my computer turned off.  I’ll have to think about it.

I’m trying to figure out if I’m actually being nudged to learn more about magic.  I know approximately nothing about it right now, so I kind of hope I’m not.  I do have to admit, however, that I have asked both Hekate and Djehuty to work with me in general.  Do to my lack of research when I started out, I didn’t even realize that These Two had associations with magic, or if I did I thought they were small.  I’m also wondering if this is somehow tied into the purity thing.  If They do want me to work on the magic thing, They are going to have to be more vocal.  I have other things ahead of it on the waiting list.  That reminds me, I should go work on my meditation for today.  That way I can check something off.

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